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Thursday, October 16, 2008
161008

Thought Im feeling better in class already, now Im somewhat able to joke with peole around me and I guess its the best thing I should do actually. If Im gonna continue to wallow in despair for long, I know Im not the only person whos gonna suffer. People around me suffers too. I dont know about how you're feeling now, but you seemed tired today. Jiayou yeah(:

Seeoh was really disappointing today, no idea why but when lessons are over and Im at seeoh trying to prac Im always in a daze. When we're having this semi-combine practice in the studio kept getting scolded because Ive missed my parts so many times the conductor was pissed. Perhaps I should find some ways to make myself more alert during the-mega-boring-and-tiring-seeoh-sessions): Anyway, my junior really reminds me of myself, I mean how I was struggling in my previous instrument in the past. Just like the old-me, she broke down crying after getting scolded by the conductor today. Sigh, its getting hard to get things back onto track again.

Anyway, when I was on my way back home I was so surprised Ive actually forgotten to pay for the bus fare y'know. At first I was kinda guilty when I realised it, but after awhile I remembered when I got onto the bus that drive actually cant wait to close the door that the door left a cut in my leg. Zzz, thought it was just a push, but who knows its bleeding. Wth, I dont know when I will stop having these cuts all over myself. Luckily Im got enough (some bio terms I cant remember) to clot my blood. Or not I think I'll die soon.

Hope you've not thrown the note that Ive attached to your maths this morning. Ha, I mean if you just wanna throw away everything that has something to do with me, I hope you've like burnt it or something so that no one else except you and I know about it uh? Ha.

Im really tired today, and Im taking the phy re-exam on the coming Wed so I think its time to start studying hard. Jiayou, and I really hope your day has been well, and think you've got training today? Guess it has been a tiring day for you, rest well and early. And please know, Im still here. (:


"You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you indefinitely"
- Always be my baby, Mariah Carey

PS. Is now appearing offline in msn and saw your apology. Y'know I really wanted to let you know its okay, but really Im sorry too, its really not okay. )': Des even said its like not a deal I should stay strong and everything, but to me its really a big deal. Its not like Im blaming/hating you, but its just this feeling that I cant get over. Sigh.